People cannot experience Knowledge because they are preoccupied with thoughts and judgments. These thoughts and judgments create a self-enclosed world for an individual, a self-enclosed world where they cannot see out. They can only see the content of their thoughts and this colors their experience of life entirely, so much so that they cannot see life at all.
Therefore, in your two 30-minute practice periods, look and see how the truth has served you. Look at experiences that were happy. Look at experiences that were painful. Particularly in painful experiences, look at how the truth has served you. Look openly. Do not defend a former position if you are tempted to do so. If pain still exists from a loss of an earlier time, accept that pain and its discouragement, but try to look and see how you were truly served by that loss.
This point of view of being served by your experience is something you must cultivate. It does not justify the experience itself. Understand this. It merely gives you an opportunity to use your experience for your advancement and your empowerment. Truth operates in the world of illusions to help those who are responding to truth in their lives. You are responding to truth or you would not be undertaking this program of development. Thus, you have arrived at the juncture where it seems that the truth competes with other things and is, therefore, very hard to recognize. In this program of development, the truth will be distinguished from everything else in such a way that you can experience it directly and will not be confused about its appearance or its beneficial existence in your life. For the truth is here to serve you as you are here to serve the truth.
Practice 27: Two 30-minute practice periods.
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July 14, 2018 Round Three: The title of this Step uses the word wisdom, but then goes on to use the word “truth” 14 times in the body of the Step. So as with the second time, I am understanding that first I need wisdom and only then will I be able to know the truth. And wisdom comes with experience. This Step is about recognizing the difference between what I want to be the truth and the actual truth. I have been disappointed by what I thought was the truth (conjured up in my own fantasies) and what actually is the truth. Scheleiki is a perfect case in point. Am I creating illusions of the truth here in Krasnaya Ushna? I am living this truth, it is not a fantasy I am creating, it is a living reality. I have had thoughts about having to live Volodya if we are to live here, but no thoughts about how I shouldn’t be here. No restraint, no reticence, nothing troubling or niggling me about this place. I only have deep feelings of joy and rightness, a deep feeling of knowing I have found my place on Earth. That is Knowledge speaking. Knowledge has been speaking deeply to me here. I have no doubts this is the truth, nothing untoward has happened to dissuade me. Only Volodya’s presence is a temporary wobble in the aspic jelly. It is pushing me to move forward on building something to live in on our plot as soon as possible. Let that become a reality. This Step leads on perfectly from the last.
I was taking more pictures in the garden this morning.