Step One Hundred and Twenty-Four


Step 124. Today I Will Not Pretend I Am Happy.
You do not need to pretend that you are happy, for this will only mask a sense of self-pity, compound your confusion and deepen your dilemma. Today be yourself, but be self-observant, keeping in mind that Knowledge is with you as you vacillate to and from, towards and away from Knowledge itself. Because Knowledge does not vacillate, it is a source of certainty, consistency and stability for you. Because it is unafraid of the world, it is a source of fearlessness for you. You are not pitiful, so you need not pretend.

Do not pretend to be happy today, for he or she who is truly satisfied may cast any expression upon the world, but within their expression will be the power of Knowledge. This is what is most important. Knowledge is not a form of behavior. It is an intense experience of life. Therefore, do not attempt to persuade yourself or others with a demonstration of behavior, for this is unnecessary.

Repeat this statement upon the hour and feel its power and its gift of freedom. Allow yourself to be exactly as you are today. In your two deep meditation practices, allow yourself to enter stillness, for when you are not trying to be someone, you may have the luxury of stillness, which is the luxury of love.

Practice 124: Two 30-minute practice periods. Hourly practice.

Here you will find the entire book free for download http://stepstoknowledge.com/

Here you will find pointers for getting started if this is your first encounter with this practice: Taking the Steps to Knowledge.

April 24, 2013 Round One: “Knowledge is not a form of behavior.” This is what speaks out to me most in this Step. And I don’t need to pretend to be happy, because I am happy, this is my natural state. I am becoming better able to sift through all the clutter of the surface mind and discern the Truth in the deeper mind. This makes participating in what is generated by the surface mind totally pointless, it is all empty words and actions with no true meaning. I am able to see this and step aside, concentrating instead on what really matters and the true, meaningful things that shine through from Knowledge. This does not mean I avoid the world around me, it just means I am aware of the folly and remain a calm island amidst the buffeting waves. I claim the luxury of stillness today.

November 24, 2014 Round Two: Again I do not need to pretend I am happy, because I am happy, I am truly satisfied. I am happy because I no longer wish things were different to how they actually are. I am happy with life as it is, I accept life on life’s terms and am not fantasizing about what I would like life to be. This is indeed a gift of freedom.

I am beginning to remember who I am, so I do not need to be someone I am not. I am happy just as I am.

During my second meditation, a song by Paul Simon came to mind, the melody, not so much the words. The melody seems to go with not pretending to be happy, and maybe the words do too.




November 2, 2018 Round Three: Again this Step is about not putting a false face on, not pretending I am happier than I am, just being myself, being who I am without pretense. Knowledge is not a form of behavior, it simply is. It is certain, steady, consistent and fearless. These are the qualities I wish to express. This is a time for going inward and being introspective. I am glad we are waiting until the spring to proceed with building and doing the foundation. This feels right. It does not feel right to begin now. I left it up to Knowledge and Knowledge is working in the lives of those involved, prompting the right decision.
Meditation - 4.38 - 5.03 (25 minutes). Powerful, potent. Went deep. I know what it means not to pretend I am happy. And I don’t have to pretend, for I am.

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