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Step 33. I Have A Mission In My Life To Fulfill.
In your two long practice periods today, dwell upon the idea that there is a great mission that you have in life. Think about this. Do not become immediately convinced by your own first responses. Think about it carefully. Think what this could mean. Think of the moments in your life when you have thought of this before or have entertained its possibility. In your two practice periods, you will have an opportunity then to consider this, but beware—make no conclusions yet.
Practice 33: Two 30-minute practice periods.
Here you will find pointers for getting started if this is your first encounter with this practice: Taking the Steps to Knowledge.
Now, however, even though not that much time has passed since I began the Steps, I feel a new contentment and willingness to just take life as it comes, confident that as I reclaim Knowledge, I will be led in the right direction. And if I am not doing what I am supposed to be doing already, it will soon become clear and I will know what I need to do. And if I have not already met the people I am supposed to encounter, this will happen in due time too—I will have this encounter. I have absolutely no doubts. And I want to be ready and awake and receptive, clear in the knowledge that this is what is meant for me. No conclusions, I will just wait and see.
July 20, 2018 Round Three: I am to think carefully about the fact that I have a mission in life to fulfill, but I am not to define it or come to conclusions. I still agree with what I wrote the last time. I have thought in the past years of doing Steps that my mission may be to translate the NM into Russian. But I am not sure. I am not coming to any conclusions. Volodya is due back today, or so he said, but he has not called. Will he show up or won’t he? Knowledge tells me not to waste so much time and energy on thinking about it. He is not important. We move on different planes.
I did the first practice in the greenhouse again from 4.30-4.50. Twenty minutes again. This feels just right. I listened in Stillness, but no specific insights came. I am past speculating on what my mission might be, if I ever speculated on it in the first place. I am not big on having a mission to fulfill, I just want my life to be a demonstration of Knowledge.
2nd practice - resting after lunch, but I dozed off for ten minutes. I do wish for my life to be a demonstration of Knowledge, regardless of who is paying attention or not. I draw no conclusions, I only have ideas. I do not know. It shall remain a mystery until I pass on.