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Step 37. There Is A Way To Knowledge.
In your two practice periods today, which will not be meditation practices, spend at least 15 minutes thinking of all the ways to gain access to Knowledge. Write down on a piece of paper all the ways to get to Knowledge. Spend both practice periods doing this and exhaust all the possibilities that you can think of. Try to be very specific. Use your imagination, but chart out routes that appear to be quite real and meaningful to you. In this way, you will know what you think about how to find a way to Knowledge, and from this you will realize that God knows the way to Knowledge.
Practice 37: Two 15-minute practice periods.
Having said that, however, when I began this Step, I felt my inherent resistance, meaning I thought - "well, I'm not going to do that, I don't need to do that," that is, I did not want to be writing things down (although it is my constant practice, but only of my own free will), I did not want to be told that I needed to write things down, and my mind was a blank anyway. But I kept at it, I kept returning to the Step and rereading it. And this morning I began writing - and I couldn't stop - the words just kept flowing onto the page!
And something clicked....
This too is my experience.
July 24, 2018 Round Three: First 15-min practice - 4.42-4.57. Again I reiterate this time - Knowledge can be reached through stillness. This is the main way to Knowledge. I still my mind in meditation and I listen at the well of Knowledge for what I am ready to hear. I listen without putting my own slant on things, I listen with an open heart, removing all preconceived thoughts and conceptions from my mind.
I listen for inner prompts and heed them. Knowledge speaks to me deep within, it is expressed as a deep yearning (a call to action) that does not go away. It spurs me on. It is also expressed as a deep contentment, when I know I am doing the right thing, on the right path (living in Krasnaya Ushna). I knew living here would entail living with Volodya even before I met him (and did not know what he was like), so I need to accept this now. I have a strong desire for Knowledge, so I am open to its promptings. I go with the flow, this is the way to Knowledge. Knowledge takes me gently where I need to go, and I go because I am open and flexible and I am ready for what Knowledge prompts me to do. Knowledge is not prompting me to go back to Moscow. Knowledge is saying I need to stick it out here and do what I need to do to build our house.
The way to Knowledge lies deep within, through the surface mind, bypassing other people’s opinions.
Second practice in the forest, opening my chakras in the sunshine after a refreshing dip in the river. Only through inner knowing is there a way to Knowledge. Nothing out in the world can bring me to Knowledge. I cannot find the way to Knowledge by joining groups, religions, being in the company of wise people out in the world. I can only come to Knowledge on my own, through my own inner journey.