We wish for you to view the world without judgment, for this will enable you to see the world as it really is. Do not think that you have seen the world the way it really is, for what you have seen is your judgment upon the world. The world you will see without judgment is a different world than you have ever seen before.
Practice 30: Hourly practice.
Having said that though, I must add that it is much easier not to judge the larger world than it is not to judge the immediate world around me, meaning what is going on in my home. The narrower the circle, the harder it is to be non-judgmental.
July 17, 2018 Round Three: Another day of practicing observation and non-judgment.
4.00 - journaling in the kitchen.
5.00 - Out front, taking out food for the dogs and stray cats. My world is the epitome of peace and quiet. Heard TV noises coming from the neighbors, someone is not sleeping after a day and night (or more) of drinking. I do not judge, I’m only glad it isn’t me.
6.00 - playing Highway Hazards on Lumosity. I should have stopped after the first game, but I wanted a higher score. Half an hour later I was still playing and my score was going down. Frustrated. Decided it was time to change activities.
7.00 - sharing Step 198 on Facebook and other social media. Glad it was coming along and I had stopped playing Lumosity. Ira, the neighbor, rang at the doorbell to ask for money (until the evening, ha, you can't fool me! if you don't have money now, how is it going to miraculously appear by evening? And if you will have money in the evening, why not just wait until then to buy what you need?). I said I don’t lend money. I won’t give her money for more vodka when I know she has no intention of paying me back. Not being judgmental, just realistic.
8.00 - writing this journal. Sasha is still asleep and I have still not finished my Lumosity games. Feeling in harmony with myself and my world. There is a breeze blowing in the window. Cool and refreshing.
9.00 - lay down to rest. Sasha was still sleeping. Feeling accomplished, because I did my work first and felt I deserved to lie down for a while. I even ended up going up 3 points on Lumosity. Go figure!
10.00 - eating breakfast with Sasha. Feeling calm and happy.
11.00 - out in forest for a walk, picking raspberries, Sasha telling me what is going on in the world. I do not judge, the world will do as it will do. I don’t think there will be any major upheaval any time soon. Refreshing dip in the river.
12.00 - editing a text for Potemkin - questions and answers about the EuRICAA project on his website. Feeling a bit weary.
13.00 - eating lunch. Tried the dill pickles I prepared three days ago. Very pleased with how they turned out - crunchy, lovely taste. Calm, easy-going, enjoying eating with Sasha, just the two of us.
14.00 - resting. I think I overdid it yesterday, which is why I have the need to rest more today.
15.00 - out in the garden, soaking up some rays. Feeling lazy.
16.00 - picking daisies to dry. Feeling content.
17.00 - putting ashes around the cucumber roots and watering with potassium permanganate to supply the plants with missing nutrients. Got caught in a couple of downpours that lasted for only 5-10 minutes. Feeling happy and pleased with what I am doing. Small jobs make me happy.
18.00 - talking to Claire on her day off. She is moving out of the sober facility into her own apartment with another girl from the facility (also Claire) on August 1. She is graduating! Tea with Sasha, feeling relaxed and happy.
19.00 - time for bed, thinking about what a lovely life I lead, how I enjoy everything I do, even washing the dishes and cleaning up the kitchen so that I come to a clean sink when I wake up in the morning.
20.00 - falling asleep, feeling peaceful.